| It Is Truly Sad When You Want a Digital Camera to Take a Picture of Your Dinner |
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| 09:08pm 21/06/2009 |
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mood:  content music: End of the Line by Traveling Wilburys
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But it was sooo good.
Tofu BBQ Sandwich
1/2 box of hard tofu
3 tbsp. vegetable oil
5 tbsp. barbecue sauce (I used Sweet Ray's Honey Chipotle)
2 tbsp. minced garlic
1/2 onion diced; 1/2 sliced
1 tomato, sliced
Hamburger buns
1. Drain tofu and press between two thick layers of paper towels for an hour, until all water has been pressed out.
2. Cut into 1/4 in. slices and place on a plate in the freezer for an hour.
3. Heat the vegetable oil over high heat. When it's popping, place the tofu slices in and fry until crispy on both sides.
4. Add diced onion, garlic, and barbecue sauce, making sure it coats the tofu well.
5. Place directly on bun and garnish with onion and tomato slices plus whatever else you like on your hamburgers.
Excellent with roast corn and strawberry shortcake for dessert, by the way.
And you thought tofu couldn't be good. |
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| Important Stuff... and Other |
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| 11:42pm 02/06/2009 |
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mood: jubilant music: Ireland by Garth Brooks, if I can ever find it
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(1) I have discovered the secret to world peace: it is, predictably, in the form of creamy, sugary deliciousness called Bluebell's "Delta Blues" ice cream.
(2) Oh, right, also I have a new neice (Heather; 7 lbs; born this morning) and my brother Chris is married.
(3) But yeah, the ice cream--oh my sweet Aunt Martha, 'tis good! |
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| Some One-Liners; And Two-Liners; And Three! |
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| 02:56pm 29/05/2009 |
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mood:  tired music: Dad... complaining. Wha'snew?
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* Like information, I prefer to get my smoke inhalation first-hand.
* Boys are like puppies: they're cute and furry, but you end up spending most of your time smacking them on the nose and telling them no.
* ME: The website says, and I quote, "Financial aid will come in on or around the first day of classes." Epic fail, UT.
BIANC: Do they know the second word of that is "aid"?
ME: They keep using that word. I do not think it means what they think it means. |
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| Peanut Butter Banana Yogurt Smoothie |
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| 08:23am 16/05/2009 |
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mood: ecstatic music: The sounds of me enjoying said ambrosia
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Super Special Smoothie
Makes 2 servings.
1 c. plain non-fat Greek yogurt
1 tbsp. peanut butter
1 small banana, sliced
1 tsp. honey
Optional: 1/2 c. almond or regular milk
(1) Combine all ingredients and blend in a blender or food processor.
(2) Chill in fridge overnight or add ice chips.
(3) Enjoy the most amazing smoothie you will have ever made in your entire life.
Unlike my Ghetto Spaghetti of yore, this is actually astounding in a good way. I'm kind of addicted to Greek yogurt anyway (hey, it's good for you!) but this. Oh my gosh. A-mazing. |
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| The Broke College Student's Cookbook |
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| 12:48pm 29/04/2009 |
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mood:  creative music: The murmuring of hundreds of panicked college students
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Ghetto Spaghetti
Ingredients:
1 small tomato
1/3 package of spaghetti noodles
1 tbsp. balsalmic vinegar
1/4 c. sliced mushrooms
3 oz. tofu
3 tbsp. olive oil
1/2 c. V8
To make:
1. Bring water to a rapid boil in a pot. Add spaghetti and bring to a boil again. Stir frequently.
2. Pour olive oil and balsalmic vinegar into pan. Find out that you have no tomato sauce. Improvise, using V8 and one small tomato cut into chunks. That counts, right?
3. Heat on high, adding tofu (mashed) and mushrooms when hot.
4. Drain the noodles and pour the "sauce" over them.
Enjoy! (Or not...) |
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| Also, Get Yourself a Cool Author Name Like Kitticus |
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| 12:47pm 31/03/2009 |
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mood: creative music: Grackles
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Step one:
Establish the two main characters. Naturally, they must both be breathtakingly gorgeous. Actual specific details to establish the veracity of claims for their beauty are optional; mainly endless repetition by any other person/slave/deity/nearby rock will suffice.
Remember, "Beauty's only skin deep" is just something ugly people say to make themselves feel better.
Step two:
Arrange for the two characters to meet. Festivals are handy for this, although worshipping at a temple will do as well. Subtlety is to be ignored at all costs: Venus always has a temple nearby.
After seeing each other, the two fall hopelessly in love and grow deathly ill until only the sight of the other can make them well again. Have the parents wringing their hands and wondering what to do. For an additional twist, have them consult an oracle: Apollo always has a temple nearby.
If the oracle says something ominous, have the parents and lovebirds cheerfully ignore the threat. Instead, throw the two together and hint that they will live happily ever after.
Step three:
Shatter those last expectations you established. What kind of story is that?
The two lovebirds are swept away onto a ship, where they cry and pray to various gods. Have the crew threaten to sell the two into slavery. More crying ensues. They swear a pact and are separated.
Step four:
Whenever the plot starts to stagnate, have some person/slave/deity/nearby rock fall in love with one of the two (sexual orientation optional) and take them to safety.
Step five:
There will always, always be pirates.
Step six:
Whenever the plot starts to stagnate, feel free to use your imagination. Perhaps an agressive female wants to have sex with your main character--have someone fall in love with him and rescue him! Maybe some barbarians need the girl for a virgin sacrifice--have someone fall in love with her and rescue her! A lion escapes from a nearby gladiator practice and wants to eat Guy/Girl--someone falls in love with him/her and leaps to the rescue!
The possibilities are endless.
Step seven:
For fun, have a bad guy turn into a good guy halfway through. This is easily done by having the main character recap the entire story up until this point, whereupon the Guy Formerly Known as Bad admits to a homosexual love affair he had with a gorgeous youth a long time ago.
Pick an ending for the youth: he (a) drowns, (b) is captured by pirates, (c) falls off his horse and dies, (d) is eaten by sharks, or (e) all of the above.
The possibilities are endless.
Step eight:
If you start to write yourself into a corner and run out of handy bandits, have no fear. Simply have one of the characters fake their own death (note: the other must hear about their untimely demise; ignore the fact they haven't received any information about the other up until this point). This plot device might seem a little contrived, but years later, a British playwright will be shamelessly stealing it to write a play that will bring misery and boredom to thousands of high school freshmen.
Sadly, he omits the pirates.
Step nine:
Cover your eyes and point to one of Steps 2-9. Repeat. Feel free to do this as often as needed.
Step ten:
When you find yourself growing bored with the story, wrap it all up nicely by miraculously having the two characters end up in the same place at the same time. The key here is that geography is something that happens to other people; never mind that they've been two miles away from each other previously and couldn't locate each other, when they're 20,000 miles apart they will still both end up in a temple at the same time.
Have them meet and recap the story again, for those readers who weren't paying attention the first time around. Killing off the parents is optional, but provides that critical drama to an otherwise happy ending.
A note: Years later, scholars will find your story and think that just because it's written in Greek, it's fine literature. Shamelessly abuse this preconception.
Have fun writing!
On an actual note, I want to replace some of my icons to establish a theme. I like this one, my barefoot one, and the footsie one, but the others, not so much. |
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| :((( |
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| 10:05am 22/03/2009 |
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mood: resigned
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| My Mantra Changes Depending on the Semester |
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| 10:49am 18/02/2009 |
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mood:  stressed music: Panicky Students
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Three more weeks until Spring Break... three more weeks until Spring Break... three more weeks until Spring Break... |
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kitsjay's journal